As a child, Valentine's Day is ane of the most magical holidays of the year. It's the twenty-four hours of true honey and Prince Charming together with fairytales. As nosotros grow older, though, the romantic daydreams start to lose their shine. We realize love is more complicated than finding the perfect drinking glass slipper...yet, somehow, nosotros nevertheless facial expression ourselves to lucifer the piece of job of princess (or prince).
We nevertheless chase perfection, non solely inwards of ourselves but also inwards our partners...and, when y'all receive got a chronic illness, that laundry listing of "must have's" turns into a newspaper barricade for truthful love. In fact, one the next, greatest fix? I know I'll receive got celiac illness for life. That's simply a fact. But I also know that my nutrient journey has been amount of dissimilar "panaceas." Low-processed paleo. Low fodmap. Plant based. Yoga to assist digestion, charcoal pills to assist alongside gas (or beingness glutened) together with equally good many hours spent researching online to count. Maybe the sentiment of "better (chronically ill) torso on the other side" isn't necessary simply a search for greater self worth. It's also a desperate endeavour to creep closer to that acclaimed 100% healthy...and together with then hold upward 100% worthy of love.
Because, when I'm honest, I know I receive got trivial doubts nigh my "date-ability," equally ane could telephone band it. I can't hold upward the lady friend who tin give the sack encounter his household unit of measurement for Thanksgiving dinner without lugging around my ain Tupperware feast. I can't hold upward the lady friend who tin give the sack randomly essay out the novel Chinese eating seat downwards the street or accept a kiss without asking, "Did y'all brush your teeth?" And when my fibro flares up, I'm non just the most exciting of company...and y'all likely won't discovery regard my gussied upward inwards anything than an old T-shirt and thrift store shorts.
And yet.
I've shared nervous first dates, both, ironically enough, at Chipotle. (Because what says romance to a greater extent than than "burrito bowls to go"?)
I've watched the sun laid over the ocean equally I huddled against a novel torso for warmth.
I've had some other family welcome me into their home - fifty-fifty when I consume my ain gluten complimentary dinner out of a tiffin box piece they savour homemade pizza.
I've tasted outset kisses, concluding kisses, in-between kisses (and nevertheless many to a greater extent than kisses to explore, I'm sure).
I've imagined what having a family would hold upward like...even if I'm nevertheless non certain what sort of children those would be.
I've been told I'm beautiful - when I don't experience it. I've felt similar I'm beautiful, fifty-fifty when no ane is in that place to tell me.
I've fallen inwards love, tripped over broken hearts together with had others autumn over me.
I'm non 100% healthy, together with I volition never be. But I've nevertheless been inwards love, together with promise I'll discovery it again. And, deep down, I know that I am - together with anyone alongside a chronic illness is - worthy of it, no thing the doubts that popular into my head.
Because I don't demand to hold upward able to consume "normal" nutrient to receive got a appointment night. I don't demand to be ignorant of daily pain to also know moments of daily joy. I simply demand to larn to honey myself plenty to allow mortal else regard me for all of my faults - together with honey me through them.
And isn't that what Valentine's Day - together with honey overall - should actually hold upward about? Giving upward the chase for perfection together with enjoying fourth dimension alongside the people we adore instead. Enjoying the chocolates instead of worrying how you'll piece of job them off. Laughing that your fellow forgot to trim down the thorns earlier handing y'all the roses...again. Maybe fifty-fifty enjoying the whole twenty-four hours to yourself, together with non feeling jealous when y'all regard couples walking by, hand-in-hand.
I don't claim to know what love is or to hold upward an skilful on relationships. But, from what life has taught me hence far, I create know this: I don't receive got to hold upward 100% salubrious to hold upward 100% worthy of love.
And if that isn't magical, I don't know what else is.
Happy (belated) Valentine's Day everyone!
*Also establish at Wow Me Wednesday, This is How We Roll*
What create y'all intend nigh finding honey alongside a chronic illness? Tell me your thoughts - together with honey stories, if y'all like! - below. :)
We nevertheless chase perfection, non solely inwards of ourselves but also inwards our partners...and, when y'all receive got a chronic illness, that laundry listing of "must have's" turns into a newspaper barricade for truthful love. In fact, one the next, greatest fix? I know I'll receive got celiac illness for life. That's simply a fact. But I also know that my nutrient journey has been amount of dissimilar "panaceas." Low-processed paleo. Low fodmap. Plant based. Yoga to assist digestion, charcoal pills to assist alongside gas (or beingness glutened) together with equally good many hours spent researching online to count. Maybe the sentiment of "better (chronically ill) torso on the other side" isn't necessary simply a search for greater self worth. It's also a desperate endeavour to creep closer to that acclaimed 100% healthy...and together with then hold upward 100% worthy of love.
Because, when I'm honest, I know I receive got trivial doubts nigh my "date-ability," equally ane could telephone band it. I can't hold upward the lady friend who tin give the sack encounter his household unit of measurement for Thanksgiving dinner without lugging around my ain Tupperware feast. I can't hold upward the lady friend who tin give the sack randomly essay out the novel Chinese eating seat downwards the street or accept a kiss without asking, "Did y'all brush your teeth?" And when my fibro flares up, I'm non just the most exciting of company...and y'all likely won't discovery regard my gussied upward inwards anything than an old T-shirt and thrift store shorts.
And yet.
I've shared nervous first dates, both, ironically enough, at Chipotle. (Because what says romance to a greater extent than than "burrito bowls to go"?)
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| PF Changs is a unopen 2nd for appointment night... |
I've tasted outset kisses, concluding kisses, in-between kisses (and nevertheless many to a greater extent than kisses to explore, I'm sure).
I've imagined what having a family would hold upward like...even if I'm nevertheless non certain what sort of children those would be.
I've been told I'm beautiful - when I don't experience it. I've felt similar I'm beautiful, fifty-fifty when no ane is in that place to tell me.
I've fallen inwards love, tripped over broken hearts together with had others autumn over me.
 |
| When y'all almost confront industrial plant life piece photographing yourself... |
Because I don't demand to hold upward able to consume "normal" nutrient to receive got a appointment night. I don't demand to be ignorant of daily pain to also know moments of daily joy. I simply demand to larn to honey myself plenty to allow mortal else regard me for all of my faults - together with honey me through them.
And isn't that what Valentine's Day - together with honey overall - should actually hold upward about? Giving upward the chase for perfection together with enjoying fourth dimension alongside the people we adore instead. Enjoying the chocolates instead of worrying how you'll piece of job them off. Laughing that your fellow forgot to trim down the thorns earlier handing y'all the roses...again. Maybe fifty-fifty enjoying the whole twenty-four hours to yourself, together with non feeling jealous when y'all regard couples walking by, hand-in-hand.
I don't claim to know what love is or to hold upward an skilful on relationships. But, from what life has taught me hence far, I create know this: I don't receive got to hold upward 100% salubrious to hold upward 100% worthy of love.
And if that isn't magical, I don't know what else is.
Happy (belated) Valentine's Day everyone!
*Also establish at Wow Me Wednesday, This is How We Roll*
What create y'all intend nigh finding honey alongside a chronic illness? Tell me your thoughts - together with honey stories, if y'all like! - below. :)
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